Neither are any of our friends. From the beginning of time, human societies have defined marriage as a special, as in the sense of particular, covenant between a man and a woman. Moreover, marriage has always enjoyed special deference and benefits inhering to the parties. This is largely because the family is the foundation of all societies. The marriage covenant has always enjoyed a unique covenantal status in the eyes of the State, just as much as it has enjoyed special blessings in the eyes of God. It’s the State that has crossed its eyes.
If marriage is vanquished as a uniquely protected union—even though natural revelation has for millennia infused the laws of every civilization known to have occupied the planet—then marriage is no longer a particular covenant; hence, marriage no longer exists, so we must not be married.
But like everyone else these days, we’ll act as though we are anyway.