I would prefer global forgiveness for all sin (aka, screw-ups or worse) and fresh, new beginnings in every niche of life. And that, by His grace alone, is my ultimate position before God.
But unpleasantness and disappointment linger in our mortal frames and spheres, and jolly goodwill and joy, joy, joy, are not necessarily to be reaped where bitter tidings were sown.
There isn’t always a waiver due to extenuating circumstances, like the way we felt treated, or depression, or ill-founded, (though perhaps emotionally well-funded) hardness.
Changes of heart somehow don’t get synchronized throughout the population, or even within families or other relationships. We may celebrate our own transformed perspective, and still feel the loss when someone else isn’t changed in the same way, or on the same schedule.
Some things are just hard, and some hard things just stay hardened.
Wringing hands may appear busy to the hand-wringer, but wringing hands are neither upholding nor anointing one’s fellows.
Sometimes, “It’s hard” is the hardest thing to say, because it makes us feel helpless to say it. But we are helpless, and “It’s hard” is a profoundly understanding thing to say, because it avows the unalterable fact of our helplessness, and turns us toward our only real help. Psalm 54:4.
With the grace of help, hard things don’t have to harden us. But they may still be hard.