If I had a night job at Home Depot: a conjecture

Okay, they look like they know what they’re doing…they know where they’re going… they don’t need any help. Oops, they stopped to ask Pat where something was. Okay, they’ve got it. Of course they’d be garden people. Weird, now they’re talking to Rich about furnace filters longer than I’ve ever seen anyone talk to Rich, or about furnace filters before. Okay, they’re buying the economy kind after all. Figures. That’s all they’re getting… approaching check out, typical for dinner hour couple shoppers; they just make a beeline for what they need and go.

Light up the smile; she looks a little tense. “Hi, find everything you needed?” At least she smiles back, even if he does the talking. Oh, I get it. They’re buying a bunch of mousetraps. She looks, like, if she saw a mouse, she’d probably go to the dry cleaners. “Have a nice night, folks.” She’s smiling, she almost looks like she’s trying to be brave or something…. Right, the mouse. I get it. Some people just can’t handle the mouse thing.

Oh, the people I’d meet and the stories I’d write
Of the dramas and sights of a Home Depot night.


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